Week 9

The days are going by so quickly and I often have to remind myself how long it has been since I quit smoking.   My first real attempt lasted for 8 months and I gave up quitting because of all the issues I am currently facing.  The anger, the depression, the loneliness and the feelings of not being "me".   I quit because I have a fear of what smoking can or may do to me.  These fears are of course still very real, but I fight with the addict in me so many times a day that I fear the addict will win. The craving of cigarettes is fading and my deepest battles are the psychological battles. As I hit week 9 I felt with sadness that I will be feeling like this for a while. I had hoped that the depression would have lifted a little and maybe, just maybe, I would not think about smoking for at least a day!  There is always hope for next week.  To be truly free from this addiction, this depression and this self abuse from over eating, is something I will continually strive each day for!  I will beat this and become the person I know I can, I just have to believe in myself and my abilities! (and stop bloody eating those chocolate muffins!)